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Darryl Siegel’s close relationship with her daughter, Kristy Strehlau, is greatly admired by family members and close friends.
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Mothers share a special bond with their daughters. Whether they are spending time together cooking dinners, shopping for clothes and shoes, or even sharing their most intimate secrets about love, life, and recipes, most mothers and daughters have a natural and unbreakable connection.
Even famous mothers and daughters, such as Goldie Hawn and Kate Hudson and the late Judy Garland and Liza Minnelli, share their unique talents. In fact, both sets of mothers and daughters were nominated for Oscars.
Although they are not well-known around the world, nor do they have Oscars under their belts, Darryl Siegel’s close relationship with her daughter, Kristy Strehlau, is greatly admired by family members and close friends. Living in North Strabane Township, Darryl enjoys spending about every other week with Kristy, who drives from her home in Brentwood to her mother’s house.
Once a month, Darryl visits Kristy, where she’s credited with helping her daughter organize decorating and furnishing projects. “We talk about color schemes and how things look in the house,” says Darryl. Even though they have different opinions when it comes to designing Kristy’s home, they respect each other and see their differences as a positive in their relationship. “We’re each other’s best friend,” says Darryl. “We have a good mother and daughter relationship.”
They’ll be the first to admit, however, that they don’t share physical features. Darryl has brown eyes, while Kristy’s are blue. Kristy doesn’t have perfect eyesight, but her mother had 20/20 vision until she turned 40. Showing a recent family photo of the mother and daughter, Darryl proudly points out how she and her other daughter look exactly alike, but Kristy jokes how “it’s weird” she doesn’t look anything like her mother, but does look like her sister.
They find humor in their different personality traits, too. While Darryl is more of a “take charge person,” an extrovert who doesn’t like to waste time, Kristy opts to step back and examine situations before making decisions. “She’ll have to think about things before making any judgments. She doesn’t like to rush into any decision,” says Darryl. Moreover, Darryl is more likely to show her emotions when she is angry or upset, while Kristy “holds it in” and smiles while confronting a stressful situation. Since childhood, Kristy always acted “very differently” from her mother and sister in emotional situations. “They are more emotional than I am,” she says. “They react to something first; while I build up my emotions, then react.”
Darryl says her daughter is a champion when it comes to keeping secrets. “Kristy can keep secrets better than anyone,” says Darryl. “She’ll know when my husband buys me a gift and keeps it a secret. She is very good at confidentiality.”
Darryl and Kristy both share a love for animals, the Steelers and doing fun activities together. Darryl says she encouraged her daughter to join a bowling league years ago, while Kristy inspired her mother to exercise. They have a “balanced relationship,” where they “love and support each other.”
Their strong commitment to each other stems from Kristy’s parents divorcing when she was 16 years old. A native of Dormont, Kristy, her sister, and Darryl became the “Three Musketeers,” in which the mother and her daughters were forced to support each other emotionally and financially. “They were my backbone in a lot of respects,” says Darryl. “We always said to ourselves: ‘we can do this’ and we did.”
Kristy recently found a notebook which contained encouraging notes mother and daughter had written to each other during that time. “It reminded me of the pleasant times we had together,” she says. Four years later, the “Three Musketeers” gained an addition to their family when Darryl remarried. Darryl says she felt “very lucky” that her daughters, especially Kristy, have a good relationship with her husband and still remain a strong family unit.
A compassionate animal lover, Kristy reminisces about her love for stray dogs and always wanting to take one home every time she sees it wandering around. “I just want to bring home dogs,” says Kristy. “Every time I see a stray dog, I have to stop the car and see it.”
Kristy wants to volunteer at a humane society and walk the animals, but says it would be hard not to adopt a pet and bring it home. “Kristy always wanted to bring strays home since I can remember,” says Darryl. Kristy can thank her mother for passing down her love for animals. Darryl remembers always having a pet in her house while growing up in the North Hills. Raised by her grandmother, Florence Schnarrenberger, Darryl was living in a strict household where she wasn’t allowed to join the girl scouts or have birthday parties. However, Darryl says she’s grateful she had “three dominant forces” in her life, her grandmother, aunt and uncle, who loved and protected her.
Darryl is grateful for her grandmother, aunt, and uncle raising her to become a responsible woman, which is a lesson she has passed on to her daughters. “I always taught them to make their own decisions,” says Darryl. “I’ve told my daughters that if they are willing to do something, they need to be responsible for the consequences. I tell them: ‘Think of what will happen if you do it.’”
Darryl reminisces how her aunt used to treat her “like a regular kid.” She says her aunt’s loving affection toward her made her in turn “become a better mother.” Growing up, Kristy remembers her mother being “very involved” throughout her childhood by joining the Parent Faculty Organization (PFO) and becoming a girl scout leader. However, when Darryl disciplined her daughters, she made sure they listened to reason. “I wasn’t big into spanking, so when they misbehaved I would smack them on their hands and send them to their room,” she says. “Anytime I punished them, I would talk to them afterwards and explain to them why I did it. I didn’t want my girls to think I didn’t love them.”
Kristy, who is two years younger than her sister, admits she was the one who always “got away with murder.” “She was more relaxed with me than with my sister,” she says.
Darryl says she will always treasure her grandmother’s love and nurturing and appreciates her upbringing. “She was such a great person,” says Darryl. “You look back on your younger years and you know more.”
As she grew up, Kristy has grown closer to her mother. Darryl, who works as an administrative assistant for the Keystone Oaks School District, says she has a tendency to worry about her daughter if they don’t call each other, and she talks about it with other mothers on the job. “It’s all part of being a mother,” says Darryl. “Every time I call her I want to know about her day.”
A single woman in her ’30s, Kristy is looking forward to getting married and having a family of her own some day. Darryl says she’s proud of the strong woman her daughter has become. “She stands up for what she believes in and learned to stand for her principles,” she says.
